Day 123

Day 123 ^^
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有一天，你会发现时间在我身上留下的痕迹。

有一天，你会发现我多了一些皱纹，

头发也会多了一些银丝，

我也没有从前的可爱。

时间会让一个人的外表变老，

但，也会是我爱你最好的证明。

当你说；已经没有办法回头了，

我心里也在默默的回答着；我也没有办法回头了，我不知道要怎么不爱你。

想你的每一天就是这么的自然，

爱你的每一天就像呼吸，

为你祈祷就像吃饭一样。

为你献上祝福也是我爱你的表现。

我每天都对神说；请给你快乐，心乐，平静，就算你永远都不会在属于我，我都要继续的为你祈福。你的幸福将传变成我的快乐。

我曾经说过;宝贝会是我生命中最爱的人，也说过宝贝会是我一生最后一个男生。

这到底是祝福或诅咒?

我选择了；宝贝你是我的祝福。

我选择了爱你。

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I am a grumpy kid.

For the whole of today, I am a grumpy kid. I was grumbling and whining to my daddy God. I am like a whining kid stamping my feet on the ground complaining to God. I ask daddy God, why ? why didnt he open up my heart and let me love others ? Why cant I be together with the person I love ? Why must 2 person who are in-love with each other be apart ? God why you like that one ? Why you make me feel like a weird person seeing so many people getting together, setting down and happily in-love with their other half having a family ? Then I cannot love another person other than Luoyi ? Why God you like that one ? I just keep complaining . . . . . Hmmmmmm I am unhappy. God you told me to forgive him, forget about the hurts and continue loving him, but why today I am so unhappy ? You want to tell me why Daddy God ?

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I flipped the Bible :

Deuteronomy 29:29 The secret things belongs to the Lord our God, what is revealed to you is to be with you forever.

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Revealed to me ? Revealed the forgiving, caring, understanding part ? Be so nice to him for what ? That man never even appreciate that. He only knows how to make me sad. Stop laughing at me ok. I am not stupid.

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God, you keep telling me to wait on you, wait and wait, should I wait till this man get married and have a dozen of kids while I am still the weird person waiting and waiting ? Why you told me to wait and hit me down with disappointment over and over again. Are you testing my trust and faith towards you Lord my God ? I know now I am like prophet Elijah, complaining to you like he was at Mt Sinai.

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But Daddy God, I am really very disappointed. I am tired. I am never appreciated by him.

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Daddy God replied :

For a father who loves his child, why will he give something bad to the child he loves so much. For God who loves you will give you only the best. God wants you to be strong in faith, strong in character, strong is determination. For when he gives you what you want, that will be for eternity.

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Ok I dont know what to say anymore. I think I had enough for today. I had been stoning for the whole of today all throughout my violin practice. Enough, enough of my complains to Daddy God.

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I love you God, please let me encounter more of you. Take care of my precious Isaac Luoyi. I do not know how to deal with him anymore. You deal with him yourself. Hands off for me. I put my Luoyi my Isaac into your hands. I put my precious in your hands Lord.

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Prayers: A place of agreement is a place of power. A place of agreement is a place of peace and harmony. Let power, peace and harmony behold into your household like never ending strong mighty wave. For you are the one I love. Peace and harmony be locked in your household for eternity. I pray for greatness in your entire household. For me who loves you my hubhub loves your household as well.