Because I know that, I am just worth it. My character is worth, my confident is worth it and best of all my Faith shows I am definately worth it at all expenses.

生命中，往往大家都在注意这第一次，可是，其实最重要的，是最后一次。在我们生命里，你的最后一次爱，或感动，是给了谁呢？

Before I leave

 Looks like little girl lei . . .

Round face

 Cya when I get back from southern Malaysia!

So call "male friends bo"

So call "male friends bo"

I certainly find this ridiculous when long . . . acquaintances male friends actually whatapps me and asked me really stupid questions.

: Hey girl, getting more gorgeous . . . want to catch up for a show? I went on the ask, I dont really watch movies in the theathe. (Trying to siam of my weird character of not watching movies with people I am " 3rd class " "friends". )

I am not trying to tell you that I pick on friends, 3rd class friends truly means fakers, and people with super hidden agendas.

So J when, how about coming over my place to watch I am no.4 , my immediate reaction, ftw . . .  and he adds on with, I have big screens and comfortable bed. ftw even more!

Nch called me up on wednesday while I was having my nice chills with Niki in the cafe at parkway . . .  Nch is my stupid silly neighbour, for movies is the usual pick up line. . . dah, an ftw . . . he have not give up of his idea of trying to pick me up. He was at home and wanted to fetch me from east coast to go back to the west, which is where we were staying to watch a movie together.

I tell you a secret, I did slapped someone in the movie theathe before, because he was trying to be funny. . . and after that incident which was freaking 12 years ago, I was only 15 then. NO MORE.

I turned weird with friends, even some close ones were rejected for movies. I just turned anal. F.Y.I those whom I go out movies with are buddies I am really comfortable with. That list of people have not increase since many many years ago. Call me weird, you think I care.

For one reason I know, and for how both of them sounds and sectioned to be, ftw . .  I want to bed you at the back of their mind. Sorry no thanks. I am precious, and my body too. I am saving her for a greater cause.

* By the way, I didnt go for plastic surgery. Susan is not the only one who ask me that question. I didnt. If I've would, I will be a C cup with pointy nose which looks like elves or the mermaids in Pirates of Carribean already.

Like this!

But too bad,

I am just not .

+Singing : Cause I'm Amazing. . . just the way I am . . .

Just woke up napped,

bare face . . .

 can tell right . . heheee

I love sunday!

Nice well 30 mins nap!

Gbu . .

Why Give up?

Why Give up?

Why give up when I am still so young? If I understand myself strong enough, I know that even at 80 years old, I am still not giving up, so what makes you feel that I will give up like now? Haha . . . Overly is an awesome attribute too yey!

Time to go cook my garlic chicken and dinner! Cockles dinner! Yumz.

* P.S: After I return from my business breakthrough trip I'll whip up a meal for you guys!

and

That Arvin dont finish my bah Kwa ok . . . . You have the tendency to finish all, I know you . . . Jie jie fry carrot cake for you when I get back . Confirm steady . . . and this time round crabs !! Salted egg crab !! Gbu !

KTV=戴愛玲-對的人

why do I even have the need to fall in love when I already found who can perfect my love.

^^

[KTV]鄧麗欣 - 十分愛

Day 381

Day 381

Wonderful and awesome weekend service with Dr Phil Pringle

with the message of

The best is yet to come !!

Totally blew me off my seats as my heart feel for Dr Phil's sermon,

I kept my tears from flowing down my cheeks.

For what pastor mentioned, I've just walked through that last year this time.

Good stuffs are worth to share about and this is what God made in my life

In Pslams 84:5-7

They walked through the valley of Baca, and Baca means weeping. It is a valley of cries. I was in that valley not too long ago if you happens to recall? In may 2010 not long after chou chou returned back from Italy.

My valley of cries.

and God promises me in 2010 May

I will make your worst your best!

and this is exactly what Dr Phil said moments ago.

God reminded me, He didnt forget my prayers, He remembers his promise to me. My heart melt, to feel how real my father is. A God who is my heavenly father, who is constantly concern about my entire life.

I smiled and tears started to ambushed my eyes.

Leonard, belinda's bf who is sitting next to me must be wondering, why Seven kept crying . . .  . . hohoho . . . these are tears of joy and gratefulness

and

I'll continue walking, from strength to strength, glory to glory, I will not give up!

My breakdown point is exactly my breakthrough point!

God told me 2 days ago on the bus, there, remembered day 380, the bible verses from 2corinthains.

Today Dr phil confirm God's message to me.

The beauty remains while the pain fades. What will remain is only love, for you have followed and obeyed what I have told you to forgive and continue loving. You are of a good cheer.

From Day 380: So now you should forgive and comfort him instead. Otherwise this one may be overwhelmed by excessive grief. There I urge you to confirm you love him. It was for this purpose. So this character can be proven that you are my obedient child. For what I have forgiven, you do it too. This is how it is done, so you will not be taken advantage of by Satan the devil.

Do you see how well they gel up?

Who is the one to speaks to Ps Phil, who is the one who showed me to 2 Corinthian? He must be God.

God always speaks in this way. He is so real in my life and my heart is broken for him. Therefore it will be so that God can show me what he wants me to see, to feel and to act on through his words of effects in my life. 

How can I not love God?

How can I not melt for a God who is so close to my daily life,

knows my heart, see my present and hold my future ?

A Father God who loves me so so so much. 

Immediately I spoke gently, thank you Father for acknowledging that I've done a good job.

God said: I am not someone destined to walk an ordinary life. Dont compromised to it. I am given the destiny to walk an extraordinary life. 

Have these few points

1. Resilience

2. Determination

3. Discipline

Toughen up and be hardy!

Yeh! You go Girl !!

Because, my Jesus is here to restore everything the devil have stolen and He is going to bring me from glory to glory!

Lastly, I was told through Ps Phil:

If Jesus is the reason for your relationship, then he will be the reason to bring forth the relationship you are holding on to, toughen the quality of the relationship with the one you love.

Amen!

I'll keep, keeping on until God opens the door for me.

Because I told God, I want to love a strong man, spiritually strong and mentally tough. A true real man.

I never forget what God tells me.

The way you exit is the way he enters, you who exit through love, he shall enter through love, and Jesus is Love.

God I thank you for chou chou.

and my chou chou, my heart is truly fixed,

while you may find it real absurd.

If God didnt led, he will never see me again.

Good night

Day 380

Day 380

Remove Post Seven Kaiqi

I carry him day n night, wherever i go. I eat his words, he reveals my past, comfort my pain and promise my future. He is living and reads me all the time. The living words of God, my everyday leather cover bible.

From Facebook

My lord my king, He is faithful even when I am faithless. He is strong when I was weak. He is alive and he is my life. He answers my doubts and walks with me. He loves me and this love is in abundance while it shows by overflowing through my life. I am at ease and I am peaceful. I asked God my doubts of ly and to show me my directions. Not to fall into temptations but to walk His will in His way. Even it takes for me to go through pain, I am willing. For I understand trials makes me feel more of God's mightness. Love you father.

Thank you father that you showed me the way through your words. You spoke my heart and watches my path. You guide my walk and make it safe.

Thank you father for speaking to me through 2 Corinthians 2:4

For out of an extremely troubled and anguished heart I tell you with many tears, not that you should be hurt, but that you should know the abundant love I have for you.

So now you should forgive and comfort him instead. Otherwise this one may be overwhelmed by excessive grief. There I urge you to confirm you love him. It was for this purpose. So this character can be proven that you are my obedient child. For what I have forgiven, you do it too. This is how it is done, so you will not be taken advantage of by Satan the devil.

I was reading these few verses on the bus of my everyday bible. How much I love your words God. Words that speaks your wisdom. Words that teach me what to do. I will not move until God you show me the way through confirmations and open doors. The bible is a book of instructions. But I will not act merely on just instructions. We need comfirmation from external as well.

Lord I ask that you will speak to me again through church service tomorrow, through Pst Phil. Show me the way and I will walk, and I will not look back, like how you've instructed me in the past.

amen.

.The birthday present in advance.

As you are aware, I will be traveling in June, July and August. I will not be able to finish the birthday gift for his birthday. Here's a preview of it.

Its a calendar pad I've made,

By the way,

thank you for the call 2 days ago chou chou,

But I will stick to the call of my father God.

If he hasnt give me a green light,

we'll not see each other.

I love chou chou, and because I love him,

I have to follow my Father's way.

Only Father knows what is the best for him and I really want the best for him.

Baby, we will never see each other again,

unless God opens up the door

^.^

Even if one day God tells me that I will only see you again when I am 80 years old,

I will obey God than to see you before I turn 80.

chouchou, you do not know what is the best for us,

but my Father God knows.

50 FIRST DATES: Somewhere Over the Rainbow

Maybe just one day,

I can hold the hand of the one I love,

drive on our caravan along the green pastures,

and to camp along the snow mountains as we admire the northern Aurora together.

Go on a Nat Geo trip to Paraguay Africa safari to film a documentary like what Terence and Elaine plans to do.

To take a cruise to Alaska,

and watches the sky during winter,

as it turned into 7 beautiful colours of beautiful curtains in the atmosphere

To fly a private propeller jet,

just me and him as we watches over the coastline of Hawaii.

and to make him breakfast in bed every morning without fail.

.I believe.

Chris Tomlin - Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone)

Was lost and now I am found,

Was blind and now I see.

Back to my father's arm.

My chains are gone and I am being set free,

to receive happiness through his grace upon my life.

My father has promised good to me,

his words, my heart secures,

He wore my shame and bore my pain.

My chains are gone and I am being set free,

for he has ransom me,

so I do not need to feel ashamed,

dont need to feel self condemnation,

his love came like a flood overflowing in my life.

He told me these overflowing love is to made to love his people.

To love the poor and to love the widows, to love the ophans,

to love the broken hearted and to love the unworthy.

He told me, my heart has to be broken,

so his love can fill into the brokenness and cracks of hurts to heal them.

My heart soften, God's love flows into them.

My wounds are healed, it is God's love that healed them.

Now I can fully understands love and love others like how the father has love me.

Thank you Jesus,

you bought me through your blood when the devil is trying to auction my life away.

You bought me and restored me, to who God wants me to be.

To live a life of calling, and a life with overflowing love.

Thank you Jesus,

You died, so I can live.

You took all the curses to give me all the blessings in my life.

I love you Jesus

Day 379

Day 379

Doubts

Doubting may seems to be a negative attribute in life. Today let us take another alternative through doubts we have in life.

Seeing light in doubts is my title for tonight...........

• Doubts can be a way of responding and not a way of life.

Lets take a look at this:

I read this in John 11:6 and I kept thinking about it and ask for an interpretation from the holy spirit.

We do not know why Thomas, one of the disciple of Jesus was not there to witness Christ's resurraction. He just doubt that Jesus came back to life. Not even where his 10 other good friends told him about it.

Remember this core pointer : Not even 10 close friends could change his mind!

I was thinking about it and reflecting on our daily lives. Thomas is a great man of Faith thou he doubted. Maybe there is something for us to learn about from Thomas. (Likewise I always tweet, about my good friend Joseph from Hero of faith) Today, its Thomas turn to encourage me in life.

I learn that we can doubt without having to live a doubting way of life. For Doubts encourages rethinking. It can be purposed to sharpen the mind than to change it. Doubt can be used to post the question and to get an answer, and most importantly to push for a truth to sharpen decisions.

But doubt is never meant to be in a permanent condition. Doubt is lifting up one foot and positioning to step forward or back. So in between moving forward or back, we stay in a motionless position. Majiam (as if) doing Yoga.

When we experience doubt, take encouragment for Thomas, for he didnt stay in his doubt but allows Jesus to reveal the truth to him and bring him from disbelief to belief. Take this encouragement from the fact that human struggles with doubts, like all other countless followers of God. The answer God gives you is a great help.

God do not talk through audible voice, but though situations he shaped in front of us. Feelings that brought forth within that situation. Feelings that we cant even explain, feelings of in certain situations why do we feel joy even though craps are happening right in front of you. That is joy is God. God is joy and God is love. God is peace and God is calming.

Many times, God is speaking to us in our lives, we just didnt figure out that was him talking. He can fill out heart with emotions we cannot understand and plants seed that will bear fruits in our heart. We are born out of God. He shaped us with his bare hands, and breathe his breath into our body. In Genesis. We are created out of God's image and likeness. That is the reason why each and every of us has a God factor waiting to be discover when polishes or refined under trials of fire testing. When human God factor is in full blown, our true potential are maximised. We turn super creative and we have no fear to achieve what we suppose to do in life.

God do not want us to live in regrets or in agony. But in many times, because we are imperfect and blinded by the lies of the world. It hinders our potential to be full-blown. We have fear in life, timidity, we are easily tempted and we have uncertainty.

Therefore dont settle into doubts but move on from it. Check your blind spots, confirm front centre back, move your sedan out of the way. Slient doubts dont get answers.

God promised in the book of Mathew, ask and you shall receive, seek and you shall find, knock and it will be opened to you. Its a promise. God is almighty but only thing God cant do, its, God cannot lie. A promise is a promise. God's character doesnt allows him to lie. God has got no character flaws.

Good night, and may you seek and find some answers in life through this post.

Day 378

Day 378

I had been experiencing pretty ridiculous stuffs lately. I had been encountering many freak incidents where I kept meeting "men" with not too nice intentions. Firstly they might think that I am a fling material, fark!! ~ Secondly, they think that being nice towards me give them certain chances to get into my pant. Nuts ~

This word "Fling" and "Scandals" had been out of my dictionary loooonnnggg nuts long ago.

Of course they got screwed and slammed by me through words. I wasn't angry with them, I was angry with how the world consume people into such mentality just like that. Out of some kind of amazing factors, some are in fact my juniors, thinking that they can fool around with me. I used to teach him maths. I am dishearten and sad in a way or another for they used to be nice and sincere people. What has seriously gotten into them? What is wrong with them, and how has the world shaped them to be?

Why all of a sudden males started popping into my life behaving like hippies? I truly grieve when attitudes of males changes just like that. Especially people whom I've known for years. Sad to say. And it seems like guys who were attracted to me are getting younger and younger.

I get truthful answers from individuals sometimes after some wild goose chase they had. And they confessed to me that, they thought I looked "farkable" what a word to use. They do tried to get something off me, but surrendered. I am too tough a nut to crack as my intimate level of defenses were really high. Dont even have a penny thought about it.

There are certainly reasons why I am really selective with the people I watches movies with. A few reasons:

 . . . . . . ok, I better not tell you guys my weakness . fullstop . 

Learn alot of things and treasure alot of things as time passes. Things in which I let loose in the past binded me as the most precious thing I treasured now.

If not for chou chou, I will never understand and know what is worth keeping. In this contempory era, sexual intimacy may be treated so lightly and none actually cares a darn about it. But towards me now, it is everything I valued. We are living in a express fastfood era. Sexual intimacy can be treated so lightly to many people. They are fond of the instant excitement and the comfort brought forth by lust. In return many times, forgoing love, it turns hurtful when lust is outburst fullgrown.

But now, I understand the value of myself. The self respect of my own, a set of self image and values I gave myself. I love my own body and respect her. It shouldn't be treated like whore as if everyone can have a part of it. She is mine and she ought to be respected. And Finally I can totally differentiate lust and love. What is love, what does it bring forth. What is lust and for how long can it substain if a relationship is built only on lust. 

Love endures while lust breaks-away once it sees problems surfacing. That is the main difference. Nevertheless, chou chou is the one who taught me this lesson.

Ridiculars

Utterly ridiculars, I cannot tolerate this! 1st, if you want to sweet talk to me, You got the wrong person. 2nd, I dont care what Ferrari or Lambogini you drives. 3rd, dont make me slap your face when you say love at first sight!! pukes max! Ridiculars! I cant stand such nonsense! back off and back off. . . . . 

Magnet

If Chouchou and I were to be pictured as objects, I guess we are 2 pieces of magnets. We cant stay close to each other, or else we attract tightly to each other. We live by distance, we are 2 beautiful strangers, living so close in each others heart, as the most immersed loved strangers. When our poles attract tightly to each other, we find it difficult to move on in life. Both of us are move in a direction to repel. Yes, the only way we move is to repel. And this is the best love we can ever give one another. Till one day we find a way that we can attract tightly to each other yet still move in a bullet train speed in life. It seems irony, to experience this best love ever in my life ; is to repel from the partner I've loved with all my heart. That is also when I realised, I can never fall in love again. One day, when you come across such person, you will truly understand how I felt. It is a frightening fact for me to accept that I cannot fall in love anymore. Because I am happily in love with the same old piece of magnet which attracted me 36 months ago by repelling him.  

Day 377

Today BD is going for his grad trip le... Hope he saw my whatsapp, and remembered my Bah Kwah from Hongkong. My bff xian is getting married on Saturday! So happy for her. Saturday will be really intensive for me, with early morning gate crash, and I got to head down straight to teach at 10am, followed by church at 3.30pm, and rushed home for wedding dinner preparation thereafter... Teaching early morning on Sunday again. Oh ya, and Happy birthday YQ!!

I've made my stand

Two days ago, I made my commitment to my loving God. I told him whatever which is not from Him, I do not want to take. No matter how I feel, or how sad I may be, I am following His will. Not my will but yours be done. This is exactly what Jesus told our Father the day before he knew that he is going to get cruxified. Because Jesus made a choice, a choice that follows the will of God our Father. He is now sitted at the right hand of the Father judging the living and the dead. Exalted high, for he had beaten death and for the effects of our sins. I trust in how faithful my Father is, and I trust him in all situations I am going to face. Cast my worries on Jesus for he told me I can. This Jesus, he delivered me ample times, save me from situations over situations. I trust him. God, he sees what is ahead of me. He has the solutions even before the problems are created. This loving Father who loves me so much, what do I have to fear? One more time God, let your new fruits be bore. I am ready to go through another round of your fiery trials. God is more concern in building my eternal character than worldy comfort. I trust in your soverignity. Please cut off whatever that will not benefit me in my walk with you Lord. Your grace will be sufficient for me to walk through these. I trust in you totally. All things work for good for those who love God, called according to his purpose. I am willing to surrender all to you. Thank you Jesus.

i am not

Giving thanks to God, firstly guess what, I am so angry when I see KEN?! what Ken, the most idiot ken! the ken I loathe so much... Since poly days till now, the irene ken, u know who... arghhhhhhhh...... i guess arvin and steph are the only ones who can understands how i felt... arghhhhhh.... so much of anger... i saw him at attica and he calls me.: Seven?! ekkkkkk whatso whatever even he is so cute, who cares a damn....  this is really anger! 

Day 376

Lord, I want to be your obedient child. I do not want to make plans without you in it. I dont want to make decisions that you will not bless. I love you Father and I know you loves me too. Which is why, I always hear you saying, : No, this is wrong, walk this way, Dont choose that, choose this.  You placed choices in front of me, but lord, I want to choose your choice. For you know what is there for me tomorrow, and holds my future. I can trust in a Father like you. You know it even before I open my mouth and ask for it. So grateful that you are always so near to me, closer than the air I breathe, you reside so near to me, closer than my own heartbeat. Bless is the man who abides in the word of God. He will be planted along the river and his leaves will not withered. Lord, bless my man whom you've told me to surrender into your hands. Bless the man, whose heart will seek you one day. Bless all my appointments today lord. I ask for your divine favor to be upon me that people like me the moment they see me, they trust me for I carry your pressence. There is no need to impress others, I am just me, and For lord you live in me, I carry the love you have, to care for others. Thank you Jesus. Amen. 

That spilt second

Because, that sparkle of love can just happen in that amazing spilit second. That is why even when you've left, I have never felt out of love. I believe love can be a lifetime. There is nothing important to proof about, for the best evidence is when there is love so deep in my heart. Joy never fail to follow. ^_^ Thank you for staying in my heart and counting on. . . for many years ahead. So amazed, chou can be so amazing. It is scary and unexplainable. I am so lucky and blessed, I met someone like him that let me realise what love is.  

Day 375

Day 375

Despite of speaking about this topic over and over again of what our mind can do wonders, I am going to talk about this topic again.

Language and Mind . . . . . .

I am certain that many of us have read books about how our mind can do wonders. This blogpost serves as a reminder to many of my blog readers. 

My first question . . 

Do you know that the speech centre of the human brain dominates over all other nerves? According to research, the speech center of the brain has very great influence over other nervous systems.

Although I have been aware of that for quite sometime, you ask me where do I learn that from?

I learned it from James. Who is James, well . .  James lived about 2 thousand years ago was a well known figure in the bible. He describes the importance of the tongue and the language clearly.

In James 3:1-12 Although the tongue is a small organ in our body, it can keep all of the body in check.

My first evidence of how the tongue works for me. A simple physical check. Put on weight, and boobs grow bigger. It works for me through a simple faith concept. It will work for you too. Although I am not a super C-cup somebody now, but people who know me cant deny that I really put on weight. My diet didnt really differ much.

Take my Sri Langka trip for an example, I believe that I will not lose weight in that trip, I believe that I will put on weight. Indeed, I did. Put on 2kgs during my mission trip in sri langka.

According to medical knowledge, due to the greater influence of speech center of the brain, it can control the body in the direction it desires.

Therefore when a person keeps saying, I am growing skinnier or fatter, the message is delievered to all the nerves of the body, and they say, Lets prepare to grow in that direction.

In the past, my chou chou always say, : You skinny ant! That tongue of comment he made naturally registered in my sub conscious mind and I believe what he said. Therefore no matter how much I eat, I couldn't grow any fatter. My chou chou always demean me in a way my sub consicious registered it, and our relationship cannot grow any further. Eventually it really broke down like what he had said and think.

Our relationship crashed not because we didnt love each other, it is his desire that we have to end it in a way or another.

So, when a person says: I am unable and I cant, all the nerves begin to reflect this message saying and amen-ing to it. Thats right, and lets make it happen. The central nerve system will instructs us that we would do all things that makes us incapable.

For those friends who always says this FML!

You screwed it up yourself by telling yourself, farked my life!

That is one reason I will excuse myself from complainers in my life. They just suck in too much of positive energy away from me. Most importantly, I do not want to condone into their negativity. The energy of positivness is important to me for me to fulfill my calling, my destiny God has called me upon to.

Why do I go for prayer meetings, why do I attend church functions, bible study and services so faithfully without fail. For these are places who gives me all kinds of positive vibes. I needed them, which is why I fellowship with my fellow cellgroup mates all the time. Encouragement is the greatest vine. We face challengers each day without fail, the genes of it is to stand up even stronger after every setbacks we faced.

For we must never lose our ambition and drive to live. In the past, I broke down, because I told myself living is such a pain. I fell into deep deep depression. I wanted to die, and soon the nerves systems shut down and I fell into a serious heart problem. My heart was just too faint to accept pains I do not deserve.

But transformation came . . . . . . .

I learn about Jesus, I heard his Good new which is his gospel, which turns darkness into light. I reinforced my belief that positive confession through our lips becomes the foundation of success in our lives. I tweet about and confessing about my 5 figure income. It came true for me. I tweet about closing 5 cases in a single evening, It came true for me. I confess about a love so real and I will keep keeping on. I have never lose faith in it. Every single confession I made, are prayers to God. A believe system God wants me to act on.

Positive confessions = Prayers

Why do I pray so much? Why do I pray for so many things? Why do I pray for my chouchou?

Its a brainwave and believe that will bring prosperity, prosperity to our body, mind and soul. I keep sending my prayer request to God, for I believe God is changing the environment, the people I will meet, the people chouchou will meet, so in all and all, these will all bring my chouchou to know God one day. This I've never give up in believing. And you will not imagine how much I have spoken good and blessings for the man I love so much.

This is my counter and . .  . . . .

5824 times I confessed for him to do well in his career, to be in health, to be happy and to fulfil his God gave destiny.

Think about this, God is faithful even when we betrayed Him and worship idols. How glad our beloved father in heaven will be, when he know we are faithful to him and only him? Our faith, our endurance, our hope is never put to waste when we trust in him.

Confess your desire in faith, and God will make them true for you. In Jesus glory and honor, I am a living, and walking testimony of God. If he can change my life, he can change yours too.

Here's the formulars

1. Abandon the habit of speaking negativity

Quit saying FML!

2. Confess the positive

YEAH! Its another 5 fig income month!

or, Its a month I can rest and stay sufficient for I know God is in charge! Negativity is not going to affect me. I may feel bad this morning, but I'll still confess and claim that, God you are Good! I praise you and I thank you for this wonderful day you've put ahead of me. I claim them in Jesus's name. I will work wonders through Holy ghost my faithful helper.

If you have a bible, go and search for all positive bible verses of God's promises. Like how I confess everyday through prayers. I interchange God's promises with that silly negative remarks of, I cant, I cant be love, I am unhappy blah blah shit.

I am a chicken feet when it comes to cold calling. But each time before I do my calls, I tell God, Lord Jesus, I will do what I can and I leave the responses to you. I expect for good results, good quality appointments, it is all in your hands God. I just do my part, and God you will do the rest. Since then till now, God hasnt disappoint me. Whatever poor responses I receive, it is not my pah sa. . . . because I just do my part, the rest is up to God. I trust in his soverignity.

Touched

I received an email from corinne, (the golfers couple who brings luxuries golf tours all around the world) and I am immersely blessed by her message. I was inspired by the couple, that contibutes to why I want to pick up golf from them too. I almost teared when reading her email. God is really really wonderful. Her message to me really served as such big encouragement, truly with God, nothing is impossible. Thank you father, you know my heart, you know what I am concern with after receiving the Message from my chouchou. You even send corinne to speak wisdom to me, when she knows nothing about my situations. But God, you knows. Thank you Jesus for your affirmation. Knowing, with you around Lord, my needs and concerns are all rest assured.

Loving only you

I live my life, loving only you, Jesus, my Lord. Only through loving you, I have to strength to continue loving. Loving the unworthy, loving people who hurt me so badly, loving the needy, loving those whom Jesus you love them too. Because your mighty love in me is so great, I have a heart to give, a heart shaped after yours, to continue loving. Alot of love to give, a heart to truly care. Thank you Jesus for walking with me.  As long as God loves you, I'll love you too. Be flying off end of the month to Penang. And in July I want to make a ministering trip back to Sri Langka or Blangadash. You know, I never thought that I can hug smelly people, dirty dirty villagers, cry with them, pray for them, help them, if not for Jesus who lives in me. Jesus's love have to pass through me, so I can give it to them. You cannot give something you hasnt possessed. I can give love, for Jesus has gave me his love for his people. Because Jesus had first loved me. Thank you Jesus.

Message

This morning, I received a message. A message from my chou chou. I cant tell him that 我真的好想好想他, I really miss him alot. At that moment, during my reply, I backspaced all my misses to him, realising that should not be an emotional burden to him. I shouldnt let him know, I miss him so much. If it is from God, it should be new. All new. I do not want to carry any old love fr chou chou, if it is really him, God will make all things new, a new kind of feelings, a new set of rules and ignite back not the old rugged love we used to have But a new first love. I miss you da da chou very much. but in order not to hinder each other's growth, we will never get to see each other again, because I really love him. God says: blessed is a man who endures trials, and God will crown him what God has promised for those who loves him. amen. IF HE IS TRULY FOR ME, I HOLD ON TO GOD'S DIVINE PROMISE TO ME. THAT IS THE ONLY REASON I LEFT, I LEFT BECAUSE I LOVE HIM SO WHOLEHEARTEDLY. 

Neighbourhood

After club mimolette closed down, my neighbourhood seems kind of quiet for I have one lesser place to go. Anyway, Im starting my golfing lessons very soon with Peter and Corrine. I will beat you in golf very soon, you smelly. My objective in golfing is not to beat chou anyway, its to go on a golf tour with them all around the world. As a hobby.. just like my judo. 

A divine Job

God, I thank you for putting me in this divine Job, you have called me to do. A job that shares good to your people, a job which enquires love and alot of love. I give you my greatest honor, with love and graditute. You spoke to me in Hebrews 13:16, DO NOT NEGLECT TO DO GOOD AND TO SHARE, FOR GOD IS PLEASED WITH SUCH  SACRIFICES. By faith, I claim today and for this week, let me bring in 10 new cases to you Father. Let it be you Father whose favor is upon me, as I pledge another 10K of income in faith to you this month. Let it be you and not me. I claim them in Jesus name. AMEN. 

Spinister

I guess I am going to stay single for the rest of my life, knowing I love to irritate the hell shit of guys who tries to date me. Even when I am on a date, I told those guys, I'll only get married to someone who is willing to take part in the Amazing Race with or vice versa go on 10 mission trips with me before marriage. The objectives are, during harsh conditions, we're still able to care for one another, support one another, and resolve conflicts together as one. You will see my worst and I am going to see your worst. This will be the best pre maritial counselling ever. Father, I know I will not be able to meet such person, unless you bring him to me. I know I can trust my man into your hands. 

Pitied

I pitied the guy who sits next to me, reason being, I kept farting and it is uncontrollable.

God you deserve it all

God, you deserve it all, for all your faithfulness. You are faithful even when I am unfaithful, you are faithful even when I committed adultery with other idols and forgot about you. I thank you for not giving me up, and award me with an everlasting life. I thank you God even when I am sick in my body, I know you have a purpose for a greater cause in me. I love you my Lord of all. I look to you as I know you can never forsake me. I give thanks to you, all  and in awe! I love you Jesus, thank you for saving my life. With all gratefulness and love. Your beloved child Seven.

Happy Birthday

Since weeks ago, I had been preparing a birthday present. A gift of encouragement, a gift which is solely my style. It will be done in late July I guess. ^_^ When its complete, I'll let you guys have a peekaboo at it.

Thank you Jesus, I do not know my readers are. This is not an open publicise blog. but I thank you Jesus that friends are fervent readers of my private space, for I have a close to 600 fervent readers monthly. Thank you for being involve in my life.

City Harvest Church New Day

陶喆_就是爱你

Jay chou-晴天

Day 374

Day 374

Thank you God, the pain had subsided. It is day 374, a day you have made new for me. Thank you Jesus in my sales, I didnt know that my sales had went up and I received this:

Father, I really have a heart filled with thank you. Lord, I thank you for chou chou ly, thank you for watching over his life. I thank you father for watching over my life, and watching over our life.

Love and Lust

One day, you will come to realise the difference between Love and Lust. The amazing sexual relationship which comes along when love is the catalyse. The wonderful relationship of love. The beauty of how awesome it can get.

A vast and huge difference

Love and Lust

^_^

Heartache

Thump thump thump . . . . Time for some ECG test again. Each time I have to do my ECG, I feel like up-ing my insurance cover. Piangz . . . . Ok, time for bed now. God protect my heart, protect my mind. Amen.

I claim my health and I claim my healthy heart. In Jesus name, no signs of heart-attack ! Thank you Jesus.

Butt

Random: I love my butt and my asshole, because it cuts my shit !

Sri Langka Colombo Takeaways - 1

My takeaways from Colombo

A place where war just ended, a place filled with poverty. I have a choice to option for the Fukuoka mission in Japan or Sri Langka. Eventually I was brought down to Sri Langka to fulfill something the Holy Spirit prompted me to do. God never fail me. It was truly an awesomely amazing trip. A trip that caught me into tears where my heart went out for the people.

Other than humanitarian work in Vanuniya, I was there for ministry work. I was so burdened during our ministry work during one of the nights we had in a village church. I was there to share a message to the people who are mostly children and widows.

During the Tamil tiger war, many husbands and sons were sent to fight the war. The war just ended less than 2 years ago. Many husbands died and many sons died. Widows are all over Varnuniya. Frankly, I will never understand how they felt. The desolate of hopelessness and a life filled with agony mixed with ample of sorrows. Imagine walking down the streets shown in the pictures in the previous post Colombo, it was a place filled with crows eating flesh of dead bodies lying on the streets. And maybe one of them is someone whom you are longing for to come home, someone you've loved with all your heart.

I felt so much for the trip. I am so greatly thankful to God, who choosed to use me. To use me as a tool to perform his signs and miracle. Thank you Jesus, you taught me how to heal people using your name. I performed healing for a grandmother who was limping. I walked her home after the clinic and laid hands on her swollen knee. The amazing thing was, when we really put our faith in God, God hears us. Thank you Jesus for healing that granny. I was so amazed of how God healed her through me.

Thank you Jesus, for using me to set people free. Free from the bondage of bitterness. Once again, Holy spirit used me to set someone free. It is a miracle. It must be Jesus. Because, I do not speak Tamil, I just use my heart to feel and to pray using the brokenness in me. I feel them. Which is why God can use me. Understand that God can only use broken people. Only broken people, they are not blinded by pride and arrogance. I am broken, broken so badly in the past, shattered into a million back then, it seems like a utterly bad experience for many others who come to hear about it. But to God, that is the best expected way I can come to know Him and for Him God to use me as his vessel.

Because I was badly broken, that was my greatest strength as I walked on. That brokenness has the strength of Love. My strength is Love, no one can take it away. I love people, and I love every single one God wants me to love. If you will to ask me to conclude this mission trip in a single day. I really can't. Simply, I can't finish describing my inner feelings of how God showed me during my entire trip.

x.x.x I do not know why, I told God, Father can you send my chou with me during one of those trips ? For lord, I really want him to experience what is loving others without agenda. I was so touched by the people, who hugged me and cried, thanking me for setting their agony free through doing deliverance. Although we dont speak the same language. But this language of love has got no barriers.

Jesus oh lord, because your love filled me, which is why I can love others like how you have loved me. I can love the needy, I can continue loving someone who hurt me so badly, and at the same time not being torture by pain of scars left in my heart. For my emotion wounds are completely healed by your nailed hands Jesus. Thank you. Thank you for giving me freedom. Thank you Jesus.

We Are The World 25 For Haiti - Official Video

Colombo

Day 1

Disclaimer: This is going to be a long post!

^-^

10.30pm at Singapore Changi Airport

our flight is at 12.50am flying  via Emirates

awaiting for boarding 

 Day 2

 After 4 and a half hours of flight we are at Colombo

 As we thought that DFS airport should be selling DFS items,

Colombo Airport has its specialty of selling washing machines.

Weird right!

2.30am at Colombo airport 

Colombo is 2 and a half hours behind Singapore time

and the journey is 8 hours from Colombo to Vanuniya

On our way to Vanuniya 

 Vanni Inn : The place we stay

 Scary Aircon!

Kate and I dont even dare to on it!

It seems like when you on it, insects will start running out of it!

Thank god that there are ceiling fan

 After dropping our baggages we headed off to the mobile CRS clinic as what we are objected to do in this Colombo trip.

we had some quick lunch at Pastor Surubi's house

Very soon it is sunset! So beautiful! 

 Look at my feet, swell till like mad!

Day 3

 God is good, the next day my feet are back to normal!

Amen!

Breakfast, but the scary part is the bread is mouldy!

Pray for sanification . .  . 

 thank God none of us are sick!

On our way to marketplace 

 

 Me and Corine!

 Our most happening couple!

Here for mission trip,

sister corine joined us after her Dubai trip, she fainted when we saw the hotel we are staying in.

For the last hotel she stayed in was a 7 star hotel in Dubai,

$4500/night

When she came to Colombo, she had a culture shock!

 Even thou, she said: I will go anywhere God wants me to help in.

Nevertheless, I have my loving husband with me.

 For those who have not seen a cow before, heres the cow

and

 This is cowdung! hahaaa

so many on the streets!

Stinks like mad!

 The road are so small and we have to carry the medical supplies and walk into our next mobile clinic on day 3

We are walking toward the Widow centre built by the city care group.

 The well where villagers get their water from.

 The small farm we have

The medical team setting up the dispensary 

 Caring volunteers caring for the children!

this place is filled with mosquitoes,

but love has got no barriers.

My heart really goes out for you, the Sri Langkans.

They are so poor and they cannot even afford to see any doctors even when they are ill.

We worked all the way till 8pm in the evening and had our dinner at 9pm.

Back to the run down hotel,

cold shower and bed!

Thank you Jesus for a fruitful day 

 Day 4

This is the mobile clinic on day 4

The condition is worst that the previous days

 Look at their Toilet,

the kampong 'Jamban'

Look at the amount of villagers queuing outside the clinic 

 Kids walking towards the clinic for medical treatment

Even thou, it is as hot as an oven inside the clinic,

every volunteer in this hot oven really serve with a heart full of love and care for the people.

I was sweating like a mad dog, and Doctor KJ is doing his best in treating all the paitents in the clinic.

Myself and other staffs were laying hands on the paitents for some suffers terminal illnesses, what we can do best is to pray for miracle.

We believe in a God who heals.

I was praying for an old lady who has pain in her knees and couldnt walk properly.

I really believe in a God who heals,

for those which are impossible for man to do,

God can make it possible!

She stood up and stretch her leg.

The pain were gone!

Thank you Jesus for your healing through me.

 

 So hot! hid inside the bus for some aircon!

Super buang face ^-^

As I was praying, how I wish someday God will bring the one I love to such meaningful trip with me.

Although it is definately not a comfortable trip to compliment about but my heart is really so touch with each out stretch of hands I made to help and to care.

 Finally dinner time is here and our day at the temporary setup clinic is close for the day.

Here's our medical team!

The lady with her hand up, has a name,

She is our Angelina Joie, our head nurse.

The lady next to her is our volunteer,

and her job amazed me for she is a prison warren officer!

So Cool!

 Our siblings team.

Kennedy trainee doctor in red with younger sister who is only 19 years old.

This team is so amazing,

the not only helpout in Sri Langka,

they were the ones who help out in Haiti earthquake, Sichuan, Archey and even in warzone iraq.

God, thank you for amazing team!

Day 5

Yeh! We're at the market place!

 This is their cooking oil

 Time to travel back to Colombo,

We missed Kilinochi warzone for the permit were not approved

we travelled 12 hours back to Colombo

and checked in our so called better hotel in Colombo.

Affter 12 hours of travel, we were all tired and drained

Pastor told us the hotel is slighty better, in fact all of us wouldnt expect much

but But BUTTTTT

Out of our astonishment!

WOah!!!! This is our hotel in Colombo! 

Raffles Hotel

Oh My God!

Thank You Jesus!

 and we opened our hotel room  wahhhhhhhhh!

 

 Look at their balcony with seaview!

This reminds me of Vietnam :)

 

 Day 6

 Breakfast by the sea

 and, look at my friend!

And here's the history of this century standing hotel we stayed in 

 Looking at this history, we certainly we can conclude that this place we stayed in must be haunted.

But for me, I mean who cares man!

 

 Very Raffles hotel yeh!

 and then, some camwhoring

 and then,

its time to head back to Singapore!

My takeaway for this trip, I will voice it in the next blogpost