It is coming to the end of the year, the season of sharing and love is here once again. It is marking the anniversary of when and how I met Jesus.
In year 2009, Christmas eve Jesus found me, broken and torn. He found me in a carpark when I was alone by myself. He stood beside me and comfort me as I was giving up in hope. He found me. He spoke to me and told me not to worry about what I've seen and feel at the deck of a multi-storey carpark. He told me that is just the beginning of a great transformation change for a better for the one I love.
I really do not understand what Jesus meant at that time, I was too depress at that time. That that choice I've made, I told Jesus, I choosed to believe in him. My heart was filled with disappointment and why. Hopelessness and bitterness. I cannot understand why is such things happening to me. Why is that man I love doing such cruel things to me. Why can someone be so selfish. This man told me he really love me but doing such cruel things that he knows that is going to hurt me. I really cannot forgive him. I really can't.
As Jesus comforted me and he spoke, told me forgive. Forgive him, I started tearing. I asked Jesus how to forgive? He said, bless him with words. Speak good and bless him this Christmas. I really held my tears and mumbled. I forgive and I texted my love a message of love and forgiveness. I blessed him for a wonderful Christmas while I was crying.
That was the first time I obeyed Jesus despite of my pain.
In weeks to come, it will be Christmas eve once again. A year had pass and I have never regretted following Jesus my Lord whom I gave my heart to last Christmas. Through forgiveness, I gain freedom. I learned to love in Jesus's way, an unconditional love towards my smelly love love like how Jesus love me. I fell so in love with Jesus and I know that I am in the right direction. His grace upon me has made me achieve and breakthrough in life.
Truly, I have forgotten how the pain feels like a year ago at hubhub smelly's carpark. It is like a memory laspe. The only feelings I have now is how comforting Jesus is when I was left alone at his house carpark. I met Jesus at his house carpark, and Jesus led me into forgiving a pain which now hold no bondage to me anymore.
This year Christmas marks my first anniversary with Christ, when I was touched not in a church but in a place never expect to be. For smelly left me to cry by myself alone in the carpark, I met Jesus.
Jesus taught me in 1cor13:4
Love is patient, love is kind, love does not envy, is not boastful, is not conceited, does not act improperly, is not selfish, is not provoked, does not keep a reocrd of wrongs.
Thank you Jesus I did it according to the will of God. Through you my savior, I can love my smelly in the way you love me. I can care in the way like you cared for me.
I know and I know father, according to your will my smelly will find you. Father God, you are love. Jesus, you are love. And what binds in smelly and me is you, for you are love.
As I pray, God create a mircale in the heart of my smelly this christmas, let he has an encounter with you. I had been praying so much for him each and every single night without fail. Let your will be done. God I love smelly so much despite of all the happenings around us. Please led him and show him what is life!
Amen
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